lots of requests to know "how I am"... thanks for asking I know Im behind
I am frazzled and reworked,
new and sincerely puzzled
loved and loving
... emotional
INSPIRED
dancing with courage and fear
listening
Wintering (mostly) in Silverton
Missing Amma tour
Sad I cant keep up with everyone
Newly exploring FaceBook
Tired
New snow sparkles in my eyes, new flush on my face
teaching yoga and learning bellydance
theraputic sessions with skilled friends (thank goodness)
feeling art & movement workshops in my future... after some settle
Have way too much stuff (mine and D's from Ashland and Hawaii, his PARENT'S things)
Paperwork, email & phone are the time-consuming toppers... still much to do
Recently created a retreat plan for a local group, some new and old facilitation skills integrating
every day is a bow
and yet...
when will things feel normal?
when will I find a balance between extremes: like feeling tired of answering the question " how are you" but hurt just the same if no one asks...
ready for things to move on without him one minute, then just as pained when I'm out on errand and the pulse steadys on at the grocery or post office as if the world is the same
I know i need more quiet yet there is much stimulation
...more nature, less laptop
I get out on brilliantly sunny white walks in the hills... the contrast of hot sun and cold ground
Taking many pictures and building a portfolio for later times.... its the most fun treat right now
Im in a sweet something with a new/old "friend"
... it's supportive I think, Im enriched in new ways
and also aware of the raw element ... careful yes....
Important part is Tara expressing through me
And creative partnership with eye for photo images
loving David and letting him go
sharing his creative voice with emerging book
he's been giving me space but staying close if that makes sense
New language we now speak
Ibn expresses David often too
Tell me your unrelated segments of streaming thoughts some time ...
With love in my heart, Ananda
Yosemite Memorial, August 2009 "Relinquishing ceremony" offered by elders.In this photo: Onnolee Stevens with initiating dragonfly necklace from Barbara Cecil. Photos by Cara Cruickshank (thank you so much!)
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